Body conscious

Sometimes it feels like it is not very British to be anything but self-deprecating, and that it is drummed into us to brush off compliments and do down our own achievements.  When I post outfit photos on here I sometimes feel like there are glaringly obvious imperfections that other people are going to immediately notice and so I make jokes about them myself.  I feel like if I point out my wonky eyebrow, podgy arm or uncomfortable pose then none of you will be thinking “OMG I can’t believe she posted that, she obviously didn’t notice how terrible her hair looks” because I’ve said it first, I’m like “Yeah, I know my roots make my hair look like a giant bumble bee, whatevs“.  But when I looked at these photos on my computer after taking them in Rhodes last week I actually felt quite proud of what I’ve achieved over the last 18 months.  I wasn’t going to mention this in this post because it doesn’t feel entirely comfortable doing it, and because, let’s face it, I’m still not a size 8 and I never will be, but, over the last 18 months, through blood, sweat and tears (most of the second one but a bit of the others) I have lost a bit of weight and I actually feel pretty good about it.

I’m not going to labour the point too much because I don’t really talk about diet or fitness on my blog (I have Where Are My Knees for that) but when I started this blog, and for a long, long time afterwards, I never thought I’d post a photo of myself in a bodycon dress.  At the end of 2011, this was me – unhealthy and unfit.

Over the last 18 months I’ve just been focussing on eating healthily, and I’ve fallen in love with running.  I feel healthier, fitter, more awake and happier with my body.  For the first time, on holiday last week I felt o-kay in a bikini. Just o-kay, but not horrified/hideously embarrassed/hiding under clothes, which is a step up.  A few of you have left kind comments about my weight on blog posts and I just thought I’d acknowledge those comments – thankyou.  I have been working really hard and it means a lot that people have noticed.  This post isn’t some kind of effort to encourage more of those, I just thought it might be okay to instead of referencing all my imperfections to say that posting this is a big deal for me, for the right reasons this time.  It’s nice to give yourself a bit of a break once in a while and be positive about your achievements, I think.

, this was supposed to be an outfit post so I will get onto that, finally, I hear you cry (I don’t, that would be weird for so many reasons).  I wore this to dinner at the hotel last week.  It was only for dinner in the hotel restaurant but I love getting dressed up in the evenings when I’m away on holiday.  There’s just something about sunbathing and lazing around all day and then spending time getting dolled up for the nighttime (I know that sounds mega superficial, I promise when I was lazing around I was also reading high-brow literature and pondering current affairs) 

dress: boohoo £12 | wedges: h&m [old] | necklace: ebay £8

I hope you’re all having lovely weeks so far.  We arrived back from Rhodes earlier today – of course it now feels like we never left.  I took a few photos which I’ll share over the next couple of days; as I mentioned we had as many cloudy or rainy days as we did sunny ones so it won’t be too photo-heavy a post, promise! It was amazing to do lots of relaxing and reading but it’s also nice to be home and I can’t wait to pick up Bodhi from my parents tomorrow, been missing him loads as always!

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